At age 13, Madison Beer was on her way to a burgeoning music career after Justin Bieber shared one of her videos on Twitter. Just a few years later, she was struggling with depression that began after nude photos of her were leaked on social media and spiraled amid an onslaught of online vitriol that culminated in her attempting to take her life when she was 19.

“When I first started out in the industry the main thing I was told was, ‘Have thick skin and don’t let them get to you.’ But I felt like I was lying to myself and my fans. It does get to me. It’s horrible to experience and I don’t think I should be sending a message to people that it’s fine,” she says.

“I don’t think that’s a fair thing to tell my young fans and I also don’t think it’s a fair thing to tell haters. They need to know—even though it’s exactly what they want, of course—that their words do hurt, and their words can kill.”

Now 24 and having largely reconciled with her experiences, Beer is ready to share just about all of it.

Her memoir The Half of It, out April 25, delves into her dealings with social media hatred, the rejection she felt after being dropped by her label and manager, her bouts with substance abuse and self-harm, and the stepping stones that brought her back to self-love. Even with hindsight, it’s evident the wounds of her past are still festering when she talks about them.

“I do have so much love around me and I’m so grateful, but by the same token I feel like it’s my responsibility to say, Hey, this is someone who’s been doing this for 10-plus years and I’m still not immune to the hate,” says the Reckless singer. “If I were to have been successful in my suicide attempt, people would have been like, ‘Oh my goodness we had no idea… that so horrible.’ But of course, since I’m still alive that empathy is sadly lacking.”

Beer says she still has “a bitter taste in my mouth” and still struggles with social media, “whether it’s body image issues or insecurities and self-doubt as most, if not every, 24-year-old girl does. It’s hard because it has done so much negative to my psyche, but it’s also [more recently] brought so much positivity to my life and I’ve been able to reach and touch people.”